Tebong Castillo wins 65 Million Dollars California Lotto

Fri, July 5, 2002  3:30 am

[Note: Originally posted on the Lampoon Issue of The Danao Gazette, Jan 1994.]

How will a  Poor 75-yr Old Spend Millions

Tebong should buy and put back to work the entire Durano Industrial Complex, which originally had a Cement Factory, a Sugar Mill, a Shipping Drydock, a Paper Mill, a car assembly plant, among others.

On top of that, he can have, at his command, the notoriously infamous Insular Police Security Agency.

Give P1,000.00 to each Danawanon of voting age and assure the victory of sons Arturo for congressman and  Tebong, Jr. as mayor of Danao.

Divorce his wife Penang, convert to Islam and marry some Manila bold stars or any of the returning Brunei beauties.

These were top in the list of suggestions made by relatives, old, new and instant friends of Tebong on how or what to do with this windfall of money.

Tebong claimed he holds the winning ticket on last Saturday’s Super Lotto Jackpot but due to progressing Alzheimer symptoms and a 5-minute memory span, he could not remember where he placed the ticket.

He was 100% certain though, he got the exact winning  numbers which he maintained the past three years and written down at the back of his “cedula”.

Nephew Bobon Castillo, and friends Timmy Laurente, Paeng Mangubat and Roy Durano meticulously combed his room upside down, spread out the garbage, tore open the mattress, removed and emptied the toilet bowl, ransacked the closet and cut all the pockets of Tebong’s pants and shirts, looking for the winning ticket, to no avail.

Although they now suspect Tebong might have forgotten to buy any ticket at all, still they would not report for work the next 5 days and continue combing the entire house and search again the garbage bin to find Tebong’s misplaced lotto ticket.

Meantime, Tebong already gave the go ahead signal to his children and relatives in Danao, to borrow money from any and all money-lenders in town, promising they will be paid in a week or two plus huge interest. (MB)


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